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I struggle to make decisions. And I wish I could say that it only applies to serious life choices, but sometimes it’s in the simple things, like which pizza to order for dinner. 

The difficulty of the desicion-making depends on the importance of the situation.

So I often wonder how the hell am I going to choose my wedding dress! 

But buying a dress for the first movie premiere where I played a character with a name, Wonderlus, gave me peace about that. 

My shopping routine for events goes like this.

  1. I visit YDE and only YDE. I always seem to find what I’m looking for even when I don’t know what I’m looking for.
  2. I start at the first aisle and continue until I have 5 dresses (you can only fit five at a time). I try on each dress that makes me look at it for more than 5 seconds. So that in the end, I know I’ve tried on everything in the store and that I can buy the dress with peace in my heart. 
  3. Our family WhatsApp group gets bombarded up until the point where I think someone wants to mute it. 
  4. The elimination process starts, some dresses return to their previous spots and others remain in my arm. 
  5. I continue from where I last picked out the fifth dress for the previous round until I have five again. Then back to the dressing room. (I once tried on 15 dresses). 
  6. There are usually two dresses that I can’t choose between. So, I ask the store to keep them, so that I can take a day to think about it. The one I keep thinking about is the one I'm supposed to take. 
  7. I go back the next day and buy it.

My logic behind all of this: The more dresses I fit, the more "the one” my heart truly longs for reveals itself by staying on my mind through all the other try-on's.

(It’s almost like finding "the one”).

As I’m writing this and as a result of deep early morning conversations with friends I’m realizing that there might be a problem with my indecisivenes, my shopping routine and my idea of picking “the one”.

You see, I could’ve spared myself the contemplation and the overthinking of a whole day. I could’ve saved myself the time of trying on 5 extra dresses and enjoyed a coffee rather than making sure that I do want what I think I want. 

This dress was in my first 5 of try-on's, and the minute I tried it on, I had all the feels. The butterflies were dancing and I was smiling. So I knew, before I had to make sure, that this was the one. 

But trusting myself is something I’m still learning. Because I then spent the next hour making sure, asking them to keep it, driving to another mall the next day to fit on a dress I saw there, only to drive back and buy this one. 

So with this, I now know what I need to listen to when making decisions and then to, boldly, trust myself. 

This dress looks like it was an easy decision to make (one of those that choose itself) but I made it difficult. And I think I’m quitting that. 

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Dress & Clutch: YDE // Accessories: Lovisa // Shoes: H&M // Jacket: Borrowed :) //